Shellie Willis and Evelyn Tuiaana say they have the key to friendship.
Shellie Willis and Evelyn Tuiaana say they have the key to friendship.
“Radical candor!” Willis says, laughing alongside Tuiaana. “That’s the best kind of way to describe it.”
That candor is what’s gotten both former service members through 29 years of not just being friends, but also coworkers.
“I got deployed to Operation Joint Forge in Hungary, and I just happened to meet my new supervisor and NCO, which was Shellie,” said Tuiaana.
The two served in the United States Army Finance Corps. For decades, each was immersed in their identity as a service member. But when it was time to transition from military to civilian life, Willis and Tuiaana faced new hurdles.
“I’ve worn the same thing for 20 years,” said Tuiaana. “I was told how to dress, how I’m supposed to do my hair or makeup, what jewelry to wear.”
Making the leap out of the military came with big questions that went beyond aesthetics. Willie wanted help figuring out who she was if she wasn’t in a uniform.
“What do I even like?” said Willis. “I’ve been all I can be for everybody; what do I want? What do I want to do? What does that look like?”
Willis created the Redefining You Foundation in 2016, forming a community for service women, veterans, and military spouses who have transitioned or are transitioning out of the military.
They help women redefine their lifestyles after following military life by hosting a symposium each year.
“I see them in tears,” said Tuiaana. “Not gonna lie, because they start to actually unravel some of the stuff they haven’t discussed.”
This month they’ll mark their 10th symposium where attendees explore how to go from “now” to “next.”
“I’m going to try my best to do what I need to do to go forward and not look backward,” said Willis.
The 10th annual Redefining Your Future Symposium happens Sep. 26, 2026.
